Do You Know What Love Is?

It’s the most powerful human expression that unites hearts like no other. Love is a wonderful, all–encompassing feeling. But is it inspiration or infatuation?

Being attracted to someone can be wonderful. When you fall in love, life seems filled with drama and excitement. Otherwise much of daily life tends to be unexciting. The crucial question is: Does that person inspire you to work harder or distract you? Does his or her presence make you more determined to devote greater energies to be a better friend, a more thoughtful son or daughter? Does he or she inspire you to realise your future goals? Or is that person your central focus, overshadowing all else?
If you’re neglecting the things you should be doing, forgetting your purpose in life because you have a crush, then I would be concerned that you’re on the wrong path. A healthy relationship is one in which two people encourage each other to reach their respective goals while sharing each other’s hopes and dreams. A relationship should be a source of inspiration, invigoration and hope.
Dante Alighieri, one of the greatest Western medieval poets, had a young woman named Beatrice as his source of inspiration. He had loved her from afar since childhood. One day, after a long time apart, the eighteen-year-old Dante ran into her again on the street. He later composed a poem about his joy at that encounter, titled, ‘Revitalisation.’ In his struggle to convey his feelings for Beatrice, he created a new poetic form. She had unlocked Dante’s artistic potential.
She would remain however an unrequited love, for she married another man and died very young. But Dante never stopped loving her. Ultimately, that love enabled him to deepen the capacity of his heart and create something truly noble. In his masterpiece, The Divine Comedy, Dante depicts Beatrice as a benevolent being who guides him to heaven.
I think many things can be learned from this great poet who stayed true to his feelings, whether or not they were reciprocated. I truly believe that love must be a guiding inspiration for our lives—the driving force for us to live courageously.
If you use love as an escape, the euphoria is unlikely to last long. If anything, you may only find yourself with even more problems, pain and sadness. However much we may try, we can never run away from ourselves. If we remain weak, suffering will follow us wherever we go. We will never find happiness if we don’t change ourselves from within. Also, to treat a relationship simply as an escape, is actually disrespectful to both your partner and yourself.
Happiness is not something that someone else, like a girlfriend or boyfriend, can give us. We have to achieve it for ourselves. And the only way to do so is by developing our character and capacity as human beings, by fully realising our own potential. If we sacrifice our growth for love, we absolutely will not find happiness. The point is not to be in a hurry. Being alone is not something to be afraid of, because when the time is right you’ll find the right person to love.
If you genuinely love someone, then through your relationship, you can develop into a person whose love extends to all humanity. That sort of relationship strengthens and enriches your inner realm. Ultimately, the relationships you form reflect your own state of life. Only to the extent that you polish yourself now can you hope to develop wonderful bonds of the heart in the future.